On the Broom

by special guest correspondent, H.O. Gline

My, it was windy last Friday. Blew the numbers right off the Brian Clarke row of the scoreboard in his game against Ron Okumura . . . Talk about pathetic, did you see the poor sod on sheet five trying to tie his shoelaces without removing his curling gloves? Next thing you know, hes got the laces all tangled up in the velcro and the game is delayed for five minutes . . . Have you noticed how healthy curlers are? Me neither. But they sure talk healthy . . . Jerry Moore, for instance, claims theres no relation between getting your feet wet and getting a cold, although he does admit that if you get your feet cold, theyll get wet soon after . . . Eight or nine curlers insist that heavy drinking is the best thing you can do for your health . . . One rookie disagrees, boasting that on her doctors advice shes cut back her gin-and-tonic intake by half. Now I just drink the gin, she says . . . Several curlers swear by Fishermans Friend, or just wish they had one . . . (If Dwayne Pho was the friend of a fisherman, would be be friend or Pho?) . . . For Doug Durst, good health is simple: Take Buckleys, he says, reaching into his vest pocket for another swig . . . One who did take Buckleys was Randy Widdis, who took some all the way down to the Carolinas, where he pawned it off on the locals as exotic liqueur . . . Finally, On the Broom wonders about a couple of things: Is it true that Ernie Nicholls witnessed the Halifax explosion? . . . And, in the words of Denis Hanson, Is that a spicy sausage or . . .